'I need respect as umpire, not sympathy'

The Asian Cricket Council hosted a dinner on Sunday for the four teams competing in the Asia Cup; the occasion also brought together two men, bound by a common horror a year back.

Ahsan Raza and Thilan Samerweera were meeting for the first time after that tragic March 3 Lahore terror attack on the Sri Lankan team � Raza was the most badly injured while Samerweera received 25 stitches after a shrapnel injury.

"Last night at dinner, Sameerweera enquired about my health. We haven't met since then but we got talking instantly, sharing and recalling that incident. Mahela (Jayawardene) also came and said, 'good to see you back in international cricket'. Sometimes it's good when people sympathise but I don't feel comfortable recalling the incident," Raza said.

Next month, Raza will meet Chris Broad � the Englishman was the referee for that match and his presence helped Raza escape without a fatal injury. The two have kept in touch and Raza said they have plenty to talk about.

"Two weeks back, I called him to tell him that while he'll be the match referee for the Australia-Pakistan series in England, I will once again be the television umpire. He told me to come over, saying we need to talk a lot. We need to share something," Raza said.

He admits the fear is still there on every journey, including the one from the hotel to the Rangiri Dambulla Stadium here. "Thankfully, we have Billy Bowden with us, he's a lovely character. The security is tight here, but when I recall the current situation in Sri Lanka, there's insecurity and fear � initially, I used to wake up in the middle of the night.

"In Dubai, in my first international assignment after the attacks, I was scared. My first question to match referee Andy Pycroft was 'why we are going without security' and he said, 'here you don't need security'," he says.

There's a routine that Raza now follows. "Every match day, I talk to my family � My mother, my wife, my brothers � before leaving, otherwise I feel something might be wrong," he says. Raza, though, wants to move on and be known for his umpiring instead. "I don't require any sympathy; I need respect as a good umpire."

He got permission to move around only two months back but Raza has already made his comeback into the cricket field.

"The doctors told me I need one and a half years rest but it was too long, I had nothing much to take care of my family with , and decided to defy the advice with PCB's encouragement. Everybody is surprised on my quick return but I simply had to � for my own sake," he says.